The Grandfamily Guidebook: Wisdom and Support for Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
Ready or not, you’re a parent again. And if you’re wondering how exactly you’re going to raise your children’s children, you’re not alone.
More than 3 million Americans are raising their grandchildren, and they, like you, have done this all before. But this time, you’re parenting under different circumstances—and likely as a result of scenarios you never envisioned for your family.
Your top priority now is to help your grandchildren to emerge thriving from what may initially feel like a less-than-ideal situation. The deeply rewarding experience of creating a grandfamily in the midst of crisis reminds us that all families are built and strengthened over time.
The Grandfamily Guidebook offers just the right mix of expert advice and insights gathered from thousands of grandparents who are raising grandchildren. With this comprehensive guide you’ll avoid common pitfalls as you adjust to your new normal, and have a touchstone to come back to as things unfold. With advice on everything from engaging with birthparents, to managing legal and financial considerations, challenges with school and social life, and your own self-care, you’ll always have a practical, inspiring guide to building a grandfamily.
“The wonderful new book crafted by Dr. Andy Adesman and colleague is a true, modern treasure. I can’t think of a more timely and helpful resource.”
Steven Shelov, MD, MS
Founding Editor-in-Chief, American Academy of Pediatrics’ Caring for your Baby and Young Child: Birth - Five Years
"This is the book you need when you become a parent all over again for your grandchild. While no one plans for this to happen, you need a plan when it does! And while children have not changed in the past 30 years, what we have learned about them has. This is the guide for navigating the challenges and joys of raising your grandchild."
Ari Brown, MD
Pediatrician, Author of Baby 411, and Toddler 411
“The Grandfamily Guidebook is the perfect roadmap for grandparents navigating the journey of caring for their grandchildren!"
Jennifer Shu, MD
Co-author of Heading Home with Your Newborn and Food Fights
"Life is an unexpected journey! In their excellent guide, Adesman and Adamec offer grandparents a good overview of the joys and challenges of unexpectedly being called to parent their grandchildren. The insights offered are practical and the tone is lovingly supportive."
Harvey Karp, MD
Pediatrician, Author, Happiest Baby on the Block and Happiest Toddler on the Block
"The Grandfamily Guidebook is an indispensable part of modern child rearing and lends a parent/grandparent a right hand when we all need it the most.”
Nancy Snyderman, MD
Professor, Global Health, Stanford University
Former medical correspondent ABC, NBC News
“The Grandfamily Guidebook is well-researched, well-written and down-to-earth…. A great resource for stressed and often bewildered grandmas and grandpas!”
Tom Phelan, PhD
Author, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12
"In "The Grandfamily Guidebook," Dr. Adesman adeptly provides invaluable information and helpful tips to navigate the increasingly common scenario of grandparents raising their children's children…. This book is a must-have guide to better navigate the territory of parenting as grandparents."
Nina Shapiro, MD
Author, Hype: A Doctor's Guide to Medical Myths
Regular guest on Emmy award winning program “The Doctors”
“Grandparents who take on parenting when their children can't will find much-needed encouragement and a wealth of practical information in this clear, authoritative book. It ought to be "required reading" both for parenting grandparents and for the professionals… whose job it is to support them.”
Robert Needlman, MD
Author, Dr. Spock’s Baby Basics and co-author, Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care
“The Grandfamily Guidebook is a must read for grandparents raising their grandchildren as well as the providers taking care of the entire family.… Well written and well researched, this book is sure to become a classic “must have” on providers’ as well as grandparents’ and parent’s book shelves.”
Robin Miller, MD MHS
Co-author of Healed: Health and Wellness for the 21st Century, and The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife and Beyond
“Dr. Adesman’s latest book written in partnership with Christine Adamec, a grandmother parenting her grandson, is an invaluable handbook for grandparents raising their grandchildren.”
Carol Weitzman, MD
Director, Yale Adoption/Foster Clinic
Professor of Pediatrics and Child Study Center, Yale University
“The Grandfamily Guidebook is an excellent resource for navigating the challenges of raising grandchildren when your children — their parents — can’t or aren’t adequately caring for them…. The authors share their expertise and insights gained from interviews with many grandparents who’ve stepped up in a crisis. They offer detailed practical advice for handling distressing decisions and conflicts that commonly arise. And they address, with considerable empathy, the roller coaster of emotions — stress, worry, resentment, joy — that come with finding yourself called to parent again. The authors offer not only emotional support but specific scripts to guide grandparents in difficult interactions.”
Harold S. Koplewicz, MD
Author, It's Nobody's Fault: New Hope and Help for Difficult Children and Their Parents, and More than Moody
Founding President, Child Mind Institute
“The Grandfamily Guidebook is a timely and comprehensive resource that addresses the complexities of reality for this growing community of families, in an easy-to-read, thoughtful manner.”
Elaine Schulte, MD, MPH
Medical Director, Adoption Program, The Children’s Hospital at Montefiore, Bronx, NY
"Dr. Adesman and Ms. Adamec provide excellent, clear, and practical guidance that will be useful to grandparents facing the challenging child behaviors, difficult discussions, and complicated legal, financial, and life decisions that accompany becoming a parent again."
Nathan Blum, MD
Chief, Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics, Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia
Professor of Pediatrics, Perelman School of Medicine at the University of Pennsylvania
"The Grandfamily Guidebook can support grandparents as they cope with, adjust to and thrive in their new role. In plain language, Adesman and Adamec describe ways of identifying and dealing with grandparents’ feelings and ways of managing the middle generation of birth parents…. This very practical and readable guide offers up-to-date psychological, medical and even a little legal advice as well as resources. It is positive in its approach and provides both understanding and encouragement to grandparents raising grandchildren."
Pamela High MD
Past Chair, American Academy of Pediatrics’ Committee on Early Childhood, Adoption & Dependent Care
Director, Developmental-Behavioral Pediatrics, Hasbro Children’s Hospital, Providence, RI
“The Grandfamily Guidebook… offers comprehensive, tangible, useful information about topics as varied as parenting strategies, school and education, finances, legal rights, and more—all in a practical and easy-to-read format…. This book is a must read for all who find themselves raising grandchildren in the golden years.”
Co-author, You Can Adopt: An Adoptive Families Guide
Editor and publisher, Adoptive Families magazine
“Recognizing the large numbers of grandparents now raising grandchildren, Dr. Adesman and his colleague provide vast amounts of helpful advice, from the initial phases of taking on the parenting role through interacting with birth parents, managing illness and behavior, and interacting with schools…. The Grandfamily Guidebook will be indispensable to the many grandparents entering this new phase in their lives.”
James Perrin, MD
Professor of Pediatrics, Harvard Medical School
“A practical and sympathetic guide that will truly help grandparents navigate the complex logistics and the profound emotions of caring for their grandchildren, and for themselves, in the families they create together.”
Perri Klass, MD
Professor of Journalism and Pediatrics
New York University